Magnificent, Make-A-Difference Middle School

Celebrating high school begins in middle school. Given opportunities to develop strengths and interests, the middle school years and their subsequent experiences set the stage for future decisions. Decisions move middle schoolers forward, or set them back,

Middle schoolers need coaches, cheerleaders, people to cheer them on, answer their questions, affirm their successes, and come alongside when ideas fail. Like adults, middle (and high schoolers) gravitate toward sources or encouragement and affirmation.

Our experience is that middle and high schoolers will hang out most with those who encourage and affirm them best. 

Mike and I were (and still are with our current middle and high schoolers) intentional to champion their interests. As a result we were (are) invited into their successes and their messes!

Middle schoolers need help understanding themselves. Mike and I have learned that before we can help our middle and high school young adults understand themselves, we must know them! To know them, we must spend time with them (even when it's hard to be with them). Spending time means observing, listening, and asking. We watch how they respond in both stressful and rewarding circumstances. We observe what activities they enjoy and what makes them smile. Body language and verbal responses are windows into their hearts. What they read expresses their interests. Who our children talk about gives us understanding into the character they emulate or respect. Knowing our children takes diligence and purpose, but is deserving of my time and energy.  

When we come to know our children--what motivates, intrigues, and captivates them--we can begin to help them understand themselves. 

Middle schoolers want to make a difference. Middle schoolers need time and experiences to help them understand who the are and what they can contribute to the family, community, nation, and the world.

They need something to ponder, practice, and pursue, a way to make a difference. 

Making a difference they feel the satisfaction of collaborating and contributing, serving and giving.

Middle schoolers need help managing their time. Several facets of life motivate middle and high schoolers to manage their time: knowing they have skills to solve a problems, having a project to complete or understanding their skills can contribute to a cause. When these aspects are discovered and fostered, managing their time matters.

Time management is a necessity for accomplishment.

Middle schoolers encouragement for organization. Middle schoolers are not usually naturally organized. They usually need parents to help them brainstorm ideas. They need someone to take them shopping for organizers.

Organization is often key to time management. 

Middle schoolers need help finding and using resources. Middle schoolers have ideas and interests they want to pursue. There are things they want to build, books they want to write, businesses they want to start, logos they want to design, and fish they want to catch. Resources, tools, and significant people put those ideas and interests in motion. One of the greatest resources is time--time to process, time to think, time to talk through ideas. In and through conversation and experience, middle schoolers learn to plan, design, analyze, and evaluate, all which work together for understanding.

Without time, these key life skills cannot develop. 

Middle and high school young adults are really not any different than adults. 

Adults thrive when they understand their strengths and have the freedom to grow in those strengths, when they have people to help them process ideas and adults, when they have access o necessary tools and resources to carry out the plan, and when they are surrounded by supportive family and friends. 

Middle schoolers will surprise you! Middle school years have great potential to directly impact a student's entrepreneurial ventures, employment, or college and career path by offering options of promising study. Be ready for your middle schoolers to surprise you! Ours have surprised us many times with their ideas and plans. They had solutions we had not discovered, insight we could not see. Theirs were not only better, but because they "owned" the plans, they were more excited and successful in executing the steps to reach their goals.

This content is excerpted from the new expanded edition of Cheryl's book,  Celebrate High School: Finish with Excellence, A Guide for Middle and High School Home Education.  You can order a copy of this book by emailing Cheryl at cheryl@cherylbastian.com. This book will also soon be available on Amazon.

Cheryl will present Celebrate Middle School at the 2016 FPEA Convention. 

Toilet Paper Tubes and Thinking Skills

A few handfuls of tubes. 

"Mom, can I use the masking tape?"

Thinking. 

Trial and error.

Marble makes it to the cup!

Success.

Innovation. 

A few more days. A few more tubes. 

Make changes.

Try again.

Grows in length. 

"We need a longer door!"

"We need more tubes!"

Ten days of thinking, determination, collaboration.

Accomplishment!

Problem. Solution. Others Benefit.

My daughter saw a problem. Our play set needed care in order for our littles to have any chance of enjoying it the way she did.

"Mom, what if make the repairs, add additional weather conditioning?" 

Not really how I wanted to spend my time, but she was right. I appreciated her initiative, her heart. I knew I needed to encourage and help in the process.

Our family embraced the idea. The littles would appreciate our efforts.

Off to the home improvement store. Call Pop for instruction.

In days, work started. In days, work completed. 

Ingenuity. Initiative. Collaboration.

Problem. Solution. Others benefit. 

In the process, relationships were deepened and my daughter initiated a project, saw it to completion while involving others, and learned new skills.

Where will this experience be documented in her high school accomplishments? Another day. Another blog.

Swimmy

 A one-hour adventure with the beloved Swimmy by Leo Lionni

The preschool and elementary age fish in our school listened eagerly to Swimmy. After the reading, we chose white construction paper from our paper tray and brushed cool-hued watercolors lightly over the entire paper. We had our sights set on a mixed-media collage we found highlighted in 25 Terrific Art ProjectsBased on Favorite Picture Books by Karen Backus, Linda Evans and Mary Thompson.

As we created we strayed from the collage instructions in the book, adding our creativity with twisted tissue paper, sponge- painted seahorses, and torn paper rocks.  The results were amazing! 

My favorite moment of the adventure was the six-year-old's reaction to the fishes failure to cooperate. She sighed, "How sad!" What a character lesson!

Check out Swimmy by Leo Lionni for a powerful example of the importance of working together.

Academics, Character, Life Skills, A Blend of Many

There's been growing concern about the academic component to home education. I understand it. Home education parents feel the weight of the future of their children riding on their shoulders. Will my child have the skill set to find employment? Will my child be accepted at XYZ college? How will my child parent his future children, my grandchildren? All valid questions.

Mothering little ones (and older ones) I decided to conduct a study. A personal observation study. What is the real focus of our days? What gets the most attention? Where do my mothering energies find themselves during the day? What actions do I find myself correcting, reminding, reviewing, and restewing (if that is a word)? My findings made me even more curious. Yes, we taught academic lessons and reviewed skills, but the skeleton of our day contained much more. Much more.

Here's a brief clip of the scenarios we encountered in a three hour period:

We sit to do math (academic). Child one brings a pencil with an inadequate eraser (problem solving, life skill). Child two sits right down and opens immediately to the lesson for the day (character-work ethic). I begin to explain the math lesson (academic) while child two listens (character-attentiveness, life skill). Child one looks for another pencil (problem solving, life skill). Child two solves the math problem without complaining (academic, character). Child one sits, ready to learn and is soon engrossed with a word problem (academic). I remind each child to line up columns in three-digit multiplication problems (academic, character-work ethic). Each child finishes his or her math problem and moves to the next problem (academics, character-work ethic). Child three runs through the living room leading to the tile floor kitchen, chasing the dog. I remind the child about the safety issues of running on tile with sock-clad feet (life skill). Child one breaks the pencil tip and complains about having to get up to find the sharpener (character-work ethic). Child two continues to work on math despite the interruptions (academic, character-work ethic). While finding a pencil sharpener, child one requests a snack and asks for carrots (character, life skill,academic-nutrition). Child two also asks for a snack, requesting chocolate chips instead of carrots (character, academic-nutrition). During snack break child four works on a vocabulary lesson (academic) and becomes curious about mortgages. She asks me about the importance of saving money and how much is needed for a down payment on a house (academic, life skill). Children one and two, having finished snack, argue over a toy, each claiming they had it first (character-selfishness, life skill-conflict resolution). I pause my conversation with child four to help children one and two work out their dispute (problem solving, life skill-conflict resolution). Sock-clad child three runs through the tiled-floor kitchen AGAIN and I remind her of the danger involved (character). Math complete, I encourage children one, two and three listen to a book on tape (academic) while I continue financial conversation with child four and fix lunch (life skill, academic).

Academic? Character? Life skills? One doesn't happen without the other. In fact, had I solely concentrated on one aspect and not the others, one child would not have completed any written work and we may have had an impromptu field trip to the emergency room or vet clinic. My personal observation study proved valuable and revealing, powerfully reminding. As a home education mom, my job is far more important and a bit more difficult than simply presenting a myriad of facts in palatable chunks. My mothering impacts the totality of my children and will resonate with them for a lifetime.

P.S. For those who know me you may wonder "Hasn't she learned this yet? I mean, she has two young adults, high school home education (and one almost college) graduates?" Apparently, I still need reminding. Smile.